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The Running Series Box Set: Books 1-3 Page 5


  Grayson Brooks made me feel absolutely beautiful, and for the moment, he was mine, my date for the evening. He was holding me so tightly and gently swaying to a wonderful song. He started humming along quietly in my ear, and I couldn’t hold my hands back any longer. I had to feel that silky hair of his, so I ran my fingertips up his shoulders and over the back of his neck, causing him to shiver slightly. I loved knowing what my touch did to him. I finally wove my fingers softly in his hair, watching his eyes close for just a second as he relished the feeling.

  When the song was over, the room erupted into applause, and Creya added, “Thank you to the lovely couple for sharing in the magic of our music.”

  We took our seats and enjoyed the fabulous dinner Grayson had ordered for me. I wasn’t used to someone making my choices for me; I had been doing that for myself ever since I was about twelve. However, tonight I didn’t mind. Instead of coming across as bossy or smug, Grayson made it seem like he was demonstrating how much he knew me already and knew what I would like. His choice of grilled swordfish in a chardonnay sauce was decadent and did not disappoint.

  “When you were here last Friday night with Cooper, was that the first time you had been here for dinner?” he asked.

  “Yes, it was the first time we’d been here, but it was only for drinks. Cooper found this place while he was out running that morning, and we decided we should come check it out. We both enjoy jazz music, and it’s even better when it’s performed live.”

  “It’s funny,” Grayson began, “but I never used to listen to a lot of music. I never had the time to figure out what I really liked. Now, I always have music playing, even in the operating room. I also like to sleep with something playing in the background. I read a study a couple of years ago about how playing music softly all night helps you relax and get into a deeper sleep. Since I started doing that, I do sleep better.”

  “I’ve never heard about that, but it sounds like a great idea. I’ll have to try it since our apartment is equipped with an iPod intercom. Well, of course, you already know that since you live there, too,” I stammered, talking too fast.

  The night seemed to go by so quickly, with the music, wine, more dancing, and delightful conversation. I was pulled out of the bliss of the evening when the first notes of my favorite song drifted softly through the amplifiers.

  Creya was doing a cover of “Start All Over Again” by Dave Koz, and Grayson pulled me to my feet again, taking me to the dance floor.

  I had never really had anyone dance with me before in an open place like that, and certainly not in such an intimate way. We almost needed a room. But I wasn’t worried about anyone else in the restaurant, only Grayson, so much so that when he placed the most beautiful, delicate kiss on me, one that lingered through what seemed like an eternity, I didn’t mind who was watching. He left me powerless and only wanting more.

  “Alexandra, I know we have been seeing each other for all two hours, but I want a little private time with you. Let’s get out of here.” His words were so sharp and demanding it seemed like he was on a mission.

  “Grayson, wait, did something wrong just happen here?”

  “No, just the opposite. You are so beautiful. Your lips are so delicate. I want to be alone with you. If we stay here, I can’t be held responsible for my public display of affection.” He dropped the serious façade, and we both started giggling as we hurried from the restaurant and drove off to the apartment complex.

  “Your place or mine, Alexandra?”

  “Uh…hmm, yours,” was all I could muster. I was so nervous. Grayson’s touch, his kisses, made me senseless. But the problem was my alter ego kicking into gear, reminding me of the fact that I wanted to touch every inch of his body, but also that I would not be able to go through with what it appeared he had in mind.

  Grayson had never let go of my hand since we started our date, except to get in and out of the car or to eat. I wasn’t sure if this was a mechanism to calm his nerves or if it was a way to hold on to me so that I couldn’t leave. He had been so quiet since leaving the restaurant I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, while his blue eyes practically burned with intensity. My heart was racing, and I was sure he could feel my pulse while holding my hand.

  I knew going to his place would give me time to get to know him better, to ask questions I had about him. I still didn’t know how or where he grew up, or why he decided on the Army, or anything about his parents. I didn’t have much time to think or analyze things because we were already at his apartment.

  Grayson’s apartment was on the opposite side of the complex from mine, and the layout was different. He had a smaller island and a separate wine and coffee bar. His decor was modern in sleek black and grey colors with splashes of red.

  Letting go of my hand, he asked if I would like some wine. Wine. That would be good for calming my nerves, right? Or would it just make me more aware that this was uncharted territory and turn me completely neurotic?

  He put on some background music, “I Wish You Love” by Rachael Yamagata. Was that Grayson’s way of setting up the mood?

  I started to say something, but even I couldn’t remember what it was about. He shushed me, pulling me into another delicious kiss. His sexy mouth took mine, like he owned me, lavishing my mouth with his tongue and biting my lower lip. Our hands raked gently through each other’s hair as he nibbled at my neck hungrily. He slid one of his hands down my spine and rested it on my backside, pulling me as tightly as possible to him.

  “I can’t get enough of you, Alexandra. It’s like I’m drawn to you. I have been ever since I turned the corner in my office and laid eyes on you. Your red hair is breathtaking. Your glorious green eyes talk to me. I want to touch your creamy white skin and gorgeous long legs and this delicate ass of yours. I don’t want to let you go. Will you stay here with me tonight?”

  “Grayson, um, I…I don’t know.”

  He held up his finger and pressed it so gently to my lips. “Shh, Alex, please don’t say no. I’m not expecting anything. I just want the time with you alone, whatever it takes. I just want time with you. Please say you’ll give me that.”

  “Grayson, there are things about me you don’t know and may not understand. I don’t know how to say this.” At this point, I was trembling so badly he had to hold me tight just so I could remain standing.

  Guiding me to his black leather sofa, he said, “Come sit with me, just enjoy the music and relax. You don’t have to say anything. Just let me hold you.” He ran the fingers of one hand down my bare arm and held my hand with the other. Gently leaving tiny butterfly kisses on my temple and taking long breaths in my hair, he seemed to be drinking me in with all of his senses.

  “It’s been a while since I met someone who enjoys so many of the same things I do. You won’t believe how many women can’t understand my profession without being jealous. You can appreciate the challenges that come with such a sensitive subject and why it’s so important I want to help my patients. I can talk shop with you, and you get it, but I can also talk sports and music, and you get that too. I feel like I can finally be myself.”

  “Well, I don’t know. You might not understand how deadly serious I am about my love for the Chicago Bears,” I said, my eyes wide with mock seriousness. It was good to laugh and keep the conversation simple. But by the way he was looking at me, I could tell he wanted to know me inside and out.

  Before I could let this go any further, I was going to have to be straight with him and let him know I was packing baggage. If he decided he couldn’t deal with all of me, I needed to know now before it hurt too badly to let go. I’d gotten used to men walking out on me once they knew my story, once they knew I was damaged goods.

  “Grayson, there is something you have to know, right now.” My voice quivered and my lips trembled, so I stalled long enough to get a grip by taking a big sip of wine before catching his penetrating gaze. “I have never had an adult…um, sexual experience. It’s very hard for me. I’m sorry.


  He gripped my hand, his touch welcoming.

  I paused and took a deep breath to gather my courage. “When I was sixteen, I was raped. I’ve tried, but I just can’t seem to get past my anxiety. When I get too…close…to someone, it just comes over me in a panic attack.”

  He started to speak, but I put up my hand to stop him. “You don’t have to say anything. I just dropped that in your lap, so I’m going to leave and give you some time to process that. Thank you for a wonderful evening.” I practically jumped up from the sofa and ran out the door with all the dignity I could hold on to, not even realizing I’d left my shoes and purse.

  Real grown-up, Alex.

  I bolted to my apartment and luckily the door was unlocked, meaning Cooper was home early. I didn’t even remember at what point I started crying on the short walk home. So much for being mature about it.

  “Alexandra? What the hell happened?” Cooper ran into the kitchen, grabbing me in a tight hug. “What the hell did that son of a bitch do to you? Where is he?”

  “No! Stop! He didn’t do anything. It was me, I had…am having…a panic attack. I told him what happened to me, and then I just…” I sobbed, sinking to the floor.

  Cooper slid down the front of the cabinets with me and simply held on to me.

  “Slow your breathing down, Alex. I’ll get your medicine,” he said before calling out. “Mark! Can you come here a sec?”

  I suddenly realized we weren’t alone.

  Great. Cooper had company. I’d just interrupted his evening with Mark, and I must have left the door open because Grayson was standing in my entry hall holding my purse and shoes. He looked completely withered.

  Cooper, still holding me closely, told Mark where to look in my bathroom cabinet for my medication. Then he shook out two of the pills when his gorgeous date returned with the small brown bottle. He held a glass of water to my lips while I tried unsuccessfully to slow my breathing and stop the flashing lights that were torturing me behind my eyes.

  Copper turned to Grayson and asked him to come in and close the door. “Hey, she’s gonna be out cold in less than thirty minutes on this stuff, so I’ll help her get in to bed. Then you and I can have a nice long chat.” He helped me off the floor without ever letting me go and started to lead me to my room.

  “I want Grayson to come too. Oh, and Mark, I am so, so sorry.” Pausing in between sobs, I promised, “I’m going to get out of your hair, and I swear I’ll make it up to you both.”

  Being the gentleman that he was, Grayson took me from Cooper’s embrace and bent down, scooping me up, and carried me in to my bedroom with Cooper following, giving him a gritty-eyed look. It was going to become the battle of the caretakers, what with Grayson being the good doctor that he was and Cooper always being my savior.

  Cooper pulled out my Chicago Bears T-shirt and yoga pants. He helped me get my skirt off while Grayson fidgeted with the TV remote in my room. I had no idea if he snuck a peek or not, since the medication was starting to kick in, and I was far from caring anymore. Besides, it was what he saw every day at the office.

  Grayson’s voice was barely audible as he came and knelt down next to my side of the bed. “Alexandra, what do you want me to do? Do you want me to go or stay? What can I do?”

  I didn’t know when Cooper left us alone, but he wasn’t in my room anymore, or at least not that I could see through the haze that was falling over my eyes. I was snug in my bed, and Grayson was sitting on the floor beside me. He just looked at me with the most caring blue eyes. There was no sign of fear, no sign that he would run away from me.

  “I’m really sorry, Grayson. I didn’t handle that well at all. I wasn’t planning to have to bring it up tonight,” I mumbled through the drugs. “Will you stay with me just until I fall asleep?”

  “Alexandra, I’m here for you, and I’m not going anywhere,” he answered, brushing my hair back from my forehead and putting a warm kiss there.

  The fog took over and I disappeared.

  I woke up early in the morning, sometime before dawn. The delicious aroma of something cooking wrapped me in a safety net, and I could hear voices coming from the kitchen.

  Grayson wasn’t in my room, but my spare pillow and a blanket were folded neatly on the bench at the foot of the bed. I supposed he’d spent some time in here or even the entire night. I wasn’t sure, but he was gone now.

  I walked into the kitchen to find Cooper, Mark, and Grayson cooking breakfast and chatting away. It sounded like a frat house.

  “Hey, what’s this? A slumber party and I wasn’t invited?” I asked sheepishly. I was painfully aware my stupid emotional problems had ruined the plans of all three of these guys the night before.

  “Are you kidding? You’d have just snored through it if we had invited you,” Cooper teased, coming over to give me a hug.

  “I, for one, can testify that you don’t snore,” Grayson said sweetly, coming over to hand me my choice of coffee or orange juice, one in each hand. He leaned in and kissed me quickly, just a peck on the lips, but one that lasted just a fraction of a second longer than a perfunctory kiss. Maybe I hadn’t ruined any chance of something happening between us.

  “Down the juice and sip the coffee. Then you go get a nice hot shower, doctor’s orders. When you come out, we’ll fix you something to eat. Does an egg white omelet and artisan toast sound good, or does your prescription do a number on your stomach?”

  “Grayson, have you been here all night?”

  “Sure,” he answered with a slight shrug. “I said I wouldn’t leave you. Well, except I did leave for a little while this morning while I went for a run, then went home to shower and change. You were still snoring for that part, though.”

  “Hey!” I protested weakly. “You just said I didn’t snore.”

  “I was being kind. Besides, I can’t exactly call it snoring, since it was a lot louder than anything I’ve ever heard.” He pinched at my shoulder playfully and laughed, while I just smirked.

  “I don’t know how you’re feeling this morning, but if you’re still up to it today, we have four cases in the OR starting in ninety minutes. We’ll have to get going if you want to work with my team again and meet some of the weekend shift nurses.” Pausing to kiss me again quickly, he added, “If—and that’s only if—you feel up to it.”

  “I do. In fact, I can’t wait. Let me go get ready, and I’ll be out in a few minutes.”

  There was no need for glamour, since we were going to be in the OR all day. However, I did want to look perkier, so I applied a facial scrub to bring back some color to my cheeks and put my hair in a very business-like ponytail. I pulled on my scrubs and Danskos, the most comfortable shoes on the planet, and some pretty coral lip gloss before deciding I was ready to go.

  The kitchen was bustling, and the guys seemed to be in control. The freshly baked bread with an omelet was just the right remedy. I hadn’t felt more relaxed and more excited about a workday in so long. Of course, I simply couldn’t remember ever starting a day like this.

  Wishing a good day to Cooper and Mark, I grabbed my purse and rummaged for my keys while I walked out the door with Grayson.

  He stopped me by my elbow when I headed toward my Jeep. “Alexandra, I was wondering if you’d let me drive you today, since you’ll be with me all day.”

  “But—”

  “No buts, Alexandra. You took strong pills very late last night, and it’s early morning. They’re still in your system. If you need to leave for any reason today, I’ll call you a cab, but for now, I really don’t want you to drive. I’d feel like you were safer if you rode with me. Understood?”

  “Absolutely. And thank you for being here and for not running away from me.”

  “Alexandra,” Grayson began, turning me by shoulders to face him. “Last night you told me something about yourself that couldn’t have been easy to share. So now, it’s my turn to tell you something important. I’m not going anywhere.

  “Just so you kno
w. I’m not a stalker, but I also don’t beg ever. So if you tell me straight out you want nothing to do with me, then yes, I’ll take a hike. But if you’re as interested in me as I am in you, then we’ll work through our issues.” He planted another long, soft kiss on my eager lips while holding my face carefully in his hands. Even more romantic, though, was the way he just held me in a safe embrace for a moment before smiling and leading me to his car.

  On the way to the hospital, he drowned out the noise of the traffic with the smooth music on his iPod, holding my hand and stroking my knuckles with his thumb. Just then, “Lover, You Should’ve Come Over” by Jeff Buckley started playing in the background, and both of us seemed to get lost in the music, drifting off in our own separate thoughts.

  I began to worry the songs on Grayson’s playlist were actually telling me that maybe he, too, has an unlucky-in-love story, and I wasn’t the only one dragging a spent love cart behind me. I wanted to get to know Grayson more, especially as a person who cared for his patients as much as I had seen in him so far. I wanted to know why he wasn’t married already. Or had he been divorced or did he have any children? I wanted to know about his family life, his Army life, even boxers or briefs! Seriously, my mind just went there, and I was thinking boxers!

  This guy had gotten under my skin, like no one I’d ever known. When he touched me, I tingled in delicate places, which was a first for me considering my past experience. The yearning desire deep inside me was completely new. My brain always kicked in before I could let myself build up to that point, and I always ran away.

  We pulled in to the physicians’ parking lot and received a few looks from several other doctors when Grayson got out and opened my door before I could do it on my own.

  “Grayson, people are looking. We need to keep it professional. I don’t need hospital gossip or a conflict affecting my work,” I reminded him quietly.

  “I get it. I even agree with you. But it’s just a door and I still believe in chivalry.” His look was as stern as his tone, but there was a hint of a smile playing behind his firm exterior.